Mastering the Art of the No-Touch Handshake

no touchingFor any of you who know Richard Lau, co-founder of NamesCon, you may be aware that he often gets a bit wiggly when confronted with the outstretched hand of a stranger. That's because Richard has a fear of, you guessed it: cooties.

A self-professed germaphobe, Richard has devised some clever ways of avoiding the traditional handshake when convening in such a busy apex as Las Vegas. Manhandled casino chips, dehydration and the subsequent infrequency of restroom trips, lack of hand sanitizer stations, and non-automatic entry doors are the bane of Richard's existence in a place like Vegas, and enough to bring him down with a moderate case of the heebie-jeebies.

An aversion to hand touching can lead to some pretty awkward and hilarious moments, as demonstrated by these suave examples:

 

1. The Bruh-Oh

awkward 1 "Dude, just, wait, I mean... don't make it weird man."

 

2. The Mad Respect

awkward 2 "Hey, man! I totally never listen to your music but .. uh oh what are you doing."

 

3. The Left Hanging

high fail "Now? How 'bout now? ... Now? No... ok...that's cool."

Obviously we want to avoid any of these scenarios happening to you. And so keep all of our NamesCon attendees germ-free and healthy for the duration of your stay, we've compiled a list of some our favourite touch-less greetings that won't leave you hanging awkwardly in the void. Feel free to carry these gems into your day-to-day work lives. Not everything that happens in Vegas has to stay in Vegas.

 

1. The Grand Bow

bow "Your life is a game show, act accordingly."

 

2. The Air Kiss

air kiss "Perfect for keeping those wild animals at bay. Even the cute forest-dwelling ones."

 

3. The Business Bump

bump deals "Because the Kardashians know all about keeping it business, with a capital 'B'. No eye contact necessary."

 

4. The Hat Tip

hat tip "The elegance of Bond paired with the chivalrous grit of a cowboy."

 

5. The Crazy Eyes

nichol nod "If someone outbids you at the NamesCon domain name auction, feel free to whip this bad boy out."

 

6. The Royal Swirl

royalty "When you've done the winning bidding at the NamesCon domain name auction, and someone shoots you a #5, feel free to retort with this."

 

7. WaterNight Step To It

"This is how you greet a colleague on the dance floor and really celebrate the gift of clean water."

 

8. The Ciao for Now

simple "Sweet with a moderate sense of urgency, for when you really want to say, 'Can't wait to see you again pal!' Just keepin' it simple."

 

Bonus:

good timing "Because timing is everything."